COMMUNICATION SKILLS

Activity: Long lost friend!

Ask the students to work in pairs. Imagine you have a friend who is in a distant city in India. List down all possible methods that you can use to communicate with this friend. The methods can be innovative, crazy or non-conventional but they must be workable. The team with the most number of methods listed down wins. (Read out some of innovative ideas given by the students)

Debrief: This activity is to help the students realize that communication is key to human existence. Man has invented many techniques over the centuries to make communication easier. Over the generations, the techniques may have changed but the basic desire to speak and to hear from others remain.

Lesson Point 1: We are created to communicate

· Right from the time we are born, we communicate. Be it with our parents, our friends, teachers, strangers, authorities, employers, employees, and so on. We are designed in a way that we can communicate with God and other people (and even with animals!).

● But have you wondered what is the purpose of communication? Is it to talk and hear what others talk? Not really! The primary aim is to understand and to be understood and not just to speak! Communication is the way in which the invisible idea within the mind of the communicator can be expressed. When someone speaks, we get a glimpse of what is going on in his/her mind. Since communication is a vital component of life, we must invest time and efforts to excel in it. It is a skill we can all master.

VIDEO 1: The Power of Words

Lesson Point 2: Ingredients of communication

You may have seen good communicators who are able to interact with a large audience with confidence. What is the secret of their success? What do we need to do to be able to express our ideas with confidence and clarity? Here are some key components of a good communication.

• Listening: It is a key but often overlooked component in communication. We all need to be good listeners to become good communicators. Listening does not mean hearing alone. Listening requires more than that; it requires focus and concentrated attention, both to the speaker and the content. Without listening carefully, the communication will be meaningless and confusing.

• Speaking: There are some of us who like to talk a lot while others shy away from a conversation and do not talk at all. More than the amount of words, what we need is clarity of thought. Be it public or private conversations, we must be able to articulate our content well.

• Tone/Body language/Gestures: One of the key skills to acquire is the non-verbal communication skills. Nonverbal communication includes facial expressions, the tone and pitch of the voice, gestures displayed through body language and the physical distance between the communicators. These convey a lot to the other person and adds power to the words that we speak. These three are unique to people because of their personality but significant improvements can be made with a bit of effort.

• Writing (Offline & Online): Writing is another important aspect of communication but unfortunately it is on the decline. Earlier people used to rely heavily on written communication but with the advent of media and the internet, it is fading out. We still can use this powerful medium to express ourselves - through letters, articles, poems etc. More thinking and consideration is needed to write something than to speak it out. Handwriting is important too as it can reveal a lot about our personality.

o A lot of writing is now done on social media via comments, posts and blogs. This is a recent form of communication. It is often spontaneous and has the ability to do a lot of harm to the user. Hate speech, fake news, bullying, etc. have become a daily internet pass-time. We need to be careful about our online presence and stick to the ground rules of communication before posting something online.

Lesson Point 3: Ground rules for communication

Before learning the skills to communicate, we must first be careful about the content of our communication. We live in a world where loose talk, crude jokes, vicious trolls and filthy language has become part of everyday life. The movies and media seem to promote it. So, it is necessary to lay some ground rules or principles for all of our communication.

VIDEO 2: Socrates and the Three Sieves

So, the three questions to consider are:

§ Is it true?

§ Is it necessary?

§ Is it good/kind?

For example, if everyone in the class speaks against a teacher or a student, do not immediately join the conversation. Ask these three questions - Is it the truth or are they exaggerating. Should I engage in this conversation or is it an unnecessary one? Even if the matter is true, how can I be kind with my words?

Remember - all this applies for online comments and text messages too. Be known for your kindness rather than your anger!

Activity: Draw the words!

Ask two students to come forward. One of them will be the narrator and the other the illustrator. Provide the illustrator with a paper and pen. He must turn away from the display screen throughout the activity. Display a figure on the screen and ask the narrator to describe the figure to the illustrator as clearly as possible within the given time. The illustrator has to draw the figure. Once the drawing is done, compare the two figures. Do this activity with 3 or 4 pairs of students.

Debrief: Ask the students’ opinion of how well they performed and what could have been the improvements. We all communicate but it should be with clarity with the desire to understand and be understood.

Lesson Point 4: How to be a good communicator

● Get over inhibitions and fears: Public speaking or having a meaningful conversation with a stranger can be a daunting task for many of us. One of the main hindrances to communicating is fear of failure. Some common excuses are - “What if I make mistakes? What if they do not like what I say? My grammar is not that great!” The truth is that no one is born a great communicator. We have to learn to overcome our fears and move ahead. So, what is the key to overcome the fear of speaking - start speaking, what else! When there is an opportunity to speak in public, prepare well and speak with confidence. If you love writing, write! Start doing what you love to do. Get some feedback from someone whom you trust and respect for the purpose of improving.

● Be assertive: Some people in their passion tend to be aggressive and in the process they offend their listeners/readers. Our communication must be assertive. It means that we should express ourselves effectively and stand up for your point of view, while also respecting the rights and beliefs of others. Being assertive can help boost your self-esteem and earn others' respect. Speak with confidence and fearlessly state your view in truth.

● Work on the basics: Like any other skill, communication skills will improve with practice over time. Take time and effort to work on your skills. You will grow in confidence as you use them.

○ Listening: Make it a habit to be a keen listener to conversations. Also listen to people speak in a public setting. Observe the tones, the gestures, the body language of the speaker.

○ Reading/Writing: Of late the habit of reading and serious writing is on the decline. Most teens are comfortable with their gadgets and so real communication seldom happens. Read more. It will open your minds to the realities of life. Read a mix of fiction, non-fiction, news, poetry etc. to broaden your perspective. Writing sharpens the mind and brings in clarity. You can maintain a daily diary or write about topics that interest you. It helps in articulating your thoughts in an ordered manner.

○Vocabulary building: Words are indispensable for a meaningful communication. Develop an interest to learn new words, their meanings and usages. Do not leave an unknown word without exploring it. A dictionary will be handy to learn these new words. Keep a target of say five new words a week. You will reap the harvest of a strong vocabulary and a confident personality.

○ Public speaking: Whenever you get a chance to speak to an audience, do not hesitate. Go ahead with confidence. You may make mistakes but you will also learn from them.

● Value relationships: Communication is ultimately to build relationships. No matter whom you talk to, see if the conversation is helpful in building the relationship. Be honest while communicating with others so that trust is built.

Communication is something we all must learn how to do right and well. Remember to intentionally work on the different modes of communication and the different people we communicate with.

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Questions to ponder

Q1. What is the whole purpose of communication? Why is good communication very important?

Q2. What are some areas of improvement you find in your communications?

Q3. Can you think of any instance from the past where you could have applied the “3 sieves rule” to have communicated better?